Make Purity Culture Great Again
Show me a church that truly cares about purity, and I’ll show you a church commended by Christ on the Last Day
“Purity culture” has incredibly negative connotations in 2021.
Indeed, some of that is warranted: many have been subjected to the hypocrisy of leaders within the church who merely claim purity, while living a secret or not-so-secret life of infidelity.
In some settings, “purity” is nothing more than the asceticism of the Colossian church. Godliness, however, doesn’t come from human effort or “promise-keeping.” True, Biblical purity isn’t a result of mutually-agreed-upon purity pacts and ring exchanges. Biblical purity is a result of our identifying in and gazing upon the glory and majesty of Christ, which results in actual heart change (Col. 2:20).
Some of this negativity towards “purity culture,” however, is unwarranted and Satanic in origin. Much of the pushback stems from the hyper-sexualization of our time. This obsession with sexuality simply cannot find home inside of churches who are serious about God’s Word. Most church-goers who become hyper-sexualized by the world eventually leave the church and cry “patriarchy” when they feel the church has kept them from “being who they truly are.” The boundaries God has set doesn’t match the feelings they feel, so they leave in a huff.
Much of this hyper-sexualization is the result of Sigmund Freud, who theorized that every human being is shaped by their sexual desires. Carl Trueman writes,
Freud made human flourishing in its ideal form identical with sexual satisfaction. It also—and most significantly—made sex a matter of identity and not primarily an activity. After Freud, sex is something you are, not merely something you do.
A man or a woman living in Freud’s world (rather than God’s) cannot help but find a church’s desire for purity off-putting at best, and oppressively evil at worst. To them, a church that expects modesty, careful interaction, and holiness is enforcing rules that are totally unreasonable and unloving towards its flock. Pastors who command husbands to love, wives to submit, and children to obey aren’t seeking the best for their flock, but the preservation of the patriarchy.
But that’s Freud’s world. Biblically, a church that is committed to a culture of purity is a really, really good thing. In fact, this is the kind of church we should give our lives to.
“For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you (1 Thess. 4:3-4).”
There is no fuzziness here. To sum up verse three, Paul is saying: Christians, God has a plan for your life, and His plan is for you to be holy, pure, and set apart — and this includes your sexuality. There is no fog. The question isn’t “how far can I go until it’s sin.” The question is, what is the will of God and how can I live it out?
When God gives us boundaries, it is never to hurt or oppress us. It is the best thing for us. It is the most loving thing. Children who feel most loved are those children who are lovingly given boundaries. This is where maximum joy and maximum pleasure is found: in the boundaries of God.
Sin costs. It is better to appear cold and disinterested in someone of the opposite gender than to lose your soul. I am sure that there are women in my congregation that think I’m super anti-social. Thats okay. I don’t want to cross God’s boundary. I want to protect my wife, and I never want her to doubt that she is the only one for me.
The kind of church that pleases God contains men and women who are properly oriented to a Biblical worldview, and see Scripture as their final authority. They act and talk in a godly, careful, thoughtful way to one another, including the opposite sex.
Mothers model purity and grace to their daughters, while fathers model purity and strength to their sons.
Boys and girls treat each other like brothers and sisters, while men and women are consistently above reproach in all of their interactions.
Why?
Because of some creepy standard set by “fundamental,” “patriarchal,” right-wing nut jobs?
No. Because Christ is worth pleasing in every interaction. It really is that simple. I want to please God, so I will obey God. And part of obedience to God is ensuring that others are in the best position possible to please God.
“By this we know love, that He laid down His life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers (1 John 3:16).”
Another result of the world’s influence on the church is the tendency towards individualism. Many who complain about “purity culture” were never really a part of a church family to begin with. Yes, they were in the physical building, singing along to worship music, and listening to the sermons — but they were there to consume, not give. They attended Bible studies to become their “best selves.”
Those who decry “purity culture” usually have a total disregard for others’ needs within the family of God. They are the church equivalent of a wedding crasher.
The truth is, we should be just as invested in the spiritual growth of our local church family members as we are in our own spiritual growth. Men and women should deeply care how they present themselves to the opposite sex, because men and women should deeply care about the growth of God’s people.
Show me a church that truly cares about purity, and I’ll show you a church commended by Christ on the Last Day: uncorrupted by philosophies, empty deceit, human tradition, and elemental spirits of the age.
Make purity culture great again, TheoBros.
In Christ,
Justin Bullington